Oh, the drudgery!

Sometimes it's hard to swallow the, oh-so-hard, fact that life isn't an adventure all the time. Sure, there are worse problems in the world, but we all have the right to complain every now and then. You know that feeling when you know that you're on your way, you're on the go, but things are going incredibly slow, right before that "pop" that makes it all go "swoosh"? Yup, that's how I feel at the moment. Feels like i'm wading through a huge sea of tar, not in the negative sense, it's just that i'm bored out of my mind and I have no patience what so ever. So why not swing by here and let off some steam? It's been quite a while since I last came here.

So what's new? I'm still searching for my place in the world, that "magical place" where I want to settle down and everything is fluffy and cuddly and happy happy joy joy. I've ended up in Gothenburg again after about three and a half years of exile. Gonna try to hit the road when summer comes around the corner, have managed to find this awesome into-the-wild-kinda course in northern Sweden(starts in august) which i'm gonna apply for. Would be nice to do some good old travellin' before it starts. Until then i'm gonna work and save up some cash just for the sake of having some extra cash on my account. I really need to get away somewhere sometime soon, I haven't travelled properly since I came back from Africa. Sure, i've been drifting between Malmö and Gothenburg but it doesn't really count. I crave the open spaces, the endless road, the deep forests, the high mountains and the way of life that occurs only when you're on the road. I miss it real hard sometimes. But I suppose my lesson until I head out again is to be patient, that it's OK that take it slow sometimes. To relax, to be bored out of your mind, go crazy and paranoid about this insane society we all live in. In a way it's quite healthy to be stuck for a while I suppose, since it gives me even more reasons to go and even more lust for a life outside the "safety net". 

I still have that empty hole inside me, and it's not only because of the lack of travelling in my life lately, it's more the feeling of being disconnected with the world. The universe if you like. Sometimes I feel that i'm closing in on that "which-could-make-me-feel-complete", but it keeps evading me. There's always this constant longing for something of which I cannot name, nor place my finger on. I do know that it has something to do with this society, i've written all about it before(numerous times), but I still haven't found the answer. Or the cure. But one day I will. 

Or die trying.